Tug O' War

As you probably can tell from earlier postings the reoccurring theme in my life at the moment is choices. Sooo many choices. I'm not complaining, I would rather sit in a life full of choices then to have no options. But what about when every choice seems reasonable, good even? How do you decide then?
That last question I'm not sure that I will ever have an answer to. I feel though like this is just one more way that the Lord is teaching me to listen and be obedient. It's easy to obey when you know one choice might harm you or someone else, have some kind of unwelcome outcome. We tend to pick the past of least resistance or more rewarding option in that case. But what about the times when there seems to be no negative? What then?
I have the opportunity in front of me to help some messed up and hurting kids, to serve the community in an awesome way. Something that my heart beats for. To dig a little deeper into what I want to be when I "grow up". But in the midst of all the tugging I'm finding that I'm not in that place right now, I'm not strong enough to help them right now, as much as I want to.
I also have the opportunity to be a part of an amazing life group, to grow some deeper roots, to support and be supported. To grow. To stretch. To prepare. To challenge and be challenged.
I've lived the life of saying "yes" to every opportunity.. it's not fun. So now what?
I'm relearning to listen, and retraining my heart to hear the true answer, not necessarily always the one I want.
I'm learning maybe for the first time to be confident in my choices, to hold them as mine and mine alone.
I'm learning to pick "one" before the rope tears in two and no matter which way I lean I end up on my butt.
So here it is, the final choice in this most recent tug o' war....
I choose community
I choose family
I choose accountability and support
I choose for a season to let this be about me, about being whole, healthy, and about meeting others where they are just as they have met me where I am.
I choose the challenge
And I choose to own my choices. To know they are the correct ones for this season because I have taken the time to ask, and wait for the response.