...truly it is the sweetest thing... Part One

I am sitting in my room attempting to finally begin to really unpack the last eight months or so of my life... As, I sit here I am kept company by Goose awkwardly curled up on my shins and Kristene Mueller via my nano, this is a stolen moment for me, and long overdue I will admit... but I swear she has been watching me..
For quite sometime now the word over my life has been obedience... yea I know, awesome right... I didn't think so at first, my first thoughts were "that's not good.." when I think of obedience initially I think of when your parents used to tell you "you better listen and obey" usually in the context of being just about to get in trouble.. Which, ok I still think is true now and then but I have come to know that you have to also have trust in order to Obey.
I am sitting in this place of asking the Lord every other day or so "you SURE you know what you're doing right???" It's a good thing that the Lord has a sense of humor with me and isn't at all put out at my nagging questions of "what are we doing?", "when are we going to get there", "how is that gonna work".. When we were kids and would be on trips with our parents we used to ask the "how much longer..." only to have Dad reply by holding up two fingers... as I grew I realized that this was the "symbol" for "too much longer.." Sometimes I think that the Lord does something similar with me when I can't just sit and wait long enough for him to begin to tell me what we're moving towards.
In the last 8 months or so he has shifted a ton in my life, he has truly began to knock away some sharp corners of my heart, and truly change who I am in my very core. All along the way there having been marking moments where I have been able to clearly see that these are moments that the Lord is causing a change, marking that area of my life as different so that I never forget what he's done. Does that make sense?
It's like, if you've ever played the Wii fit you know that at the end of ever time you play you get to put a big stamp on the day you just finished... The Lord is holding one BIG 'OL stamp over certain areas of my life at the moment.
Ah, my brain is spinning in circles... ok this is why you shouldn't wait too long to sit and think stuff out, talk to the Lord and just be. There is so much to get out that I don't know where to begin.
Where do I start, do I start with my new found joy and freedom, do I start with the trial, heartache and sacrifice to took to get there, or with the current rocky terrain that I am walking in?
Months ago I was asked to be a part of a leadership life group, I lovingly blame that group of friends for the massive change in who I am. I am so indebted to each one of them...
Throughout our time together we gained so much knowledge, felt so much love, and saw the Lord move in BIG and small ways in our leaders. Going over the spiritual disciplines, placing myself in a place to be challenge like never before, and finally truly accepting that challenge I have come out on the other side a different girl.
Our final night together Matt, Kendall and Derrick gave each of us communion, prayer and an annointing as they felt led. That night as I sat there and watched them begin to move their way through the group my thoughts flew back and forth from serious to distracted (like..."I wonder if annointing oil will give all of us a holy zit...") And then to asking the Lord, what is it that you will anoint me for I wonder... In that moment he spoke to my heart, said I'm calling you out, no more sitting and "needing to "learn" more, before you get up and get moving, no, this is it" (don't get me wrong I am FOREVER in a state of learning) and then clearly in my mind and heart he told me "ears and lips" that was it "ears and lips"... Ok, I had watched these guys anointing people and never was it anything that strange. Feet, hands, mind, heart those things I understood but ears and lips...?
That night after communion Matt prayed over me and wouldn't you know it... that's what the Lord had put on his heart to anoint me for... it was pretty crazy. we laughed, we cried.. it was awesome! After that the three of them said that the felt that this was the night the I was being called out, there were those words again, burning into my heart as Derrick said them "Tonight you're being called out"... time to join my leaders... such a humbling moment... I will never in my life forget that feeling. They had asked me to stay and pray for the rest of the group with them, it was such an honor...
And, that was the jumping off point for me, the no return moment, where I felt the old chains that had been rusted on to my heart, my life, my mind for so long break and fall off for good... Please dont hear in this that I got to this sweet sweet moment without and trouble... trust me when I tell you, He tried me, tested me, and then did it again to be sure I was ready. There was heart hurts, sacrifice, and humbling to be done before I could whole heartedly accept the change he was bringing about that night.

...To be con't...



It's the sweetest thing
to trust you
just to know
You got everything under control

it's the sweetest thing
to trust you
just to know
You got everything

and You are making me a mountain
making me a mountain
that cannot be shaken

well You are making me a mountain
making me a mountain
that cannot be moved

high up on a rock
looking out at the horizon
watching as the storm rolls in
wondering if my heart will survive it

as the waves crash all around me
and can't remember what it feels like to be free

i know You're making me a mountain
making me a mountain
that cannot be shaken

oh You are making me a mountain
making me a mountain
that cannot be moved

You say, I've got you my baby
I've got you
it's quite the mess you're in
but it's nothing Love can't fix

so sit here upon my shoulders
and watch as it all unwinds

You are making me a mountain
making me a mountain
that cannot be shaken

i know You're making me a mountain
making me a mountain
that cannot be moved